"are you happy?"

"are you happy?" is such a difficult question
I always say yes, because i have friends
I laugh at jokes, I go out a lot and have fun
my life isn't as bad as it could be, and I don't have terrible problems
it could be worse.

but the, one night at 3AM when I'm alone
still awake, lying in bed, thinking about life
I find myself crying my heart out
suddenly I convince that nobody like me, or nobody will ever like me.
I feel horrible
and I question everything I had

and I don't know if I was ever happy at all.

Her

One day you're going to see her holding hands with someone who took your chance.
She won't even notice you because she's too busy laughing with the stupid jokes he makes,
and it will burn your heart seeing that beautiful smile on her face and realizing that you're not the reason anymore, and then it will finally hit you: it was her, it was always her.

~probably will happen~

Mematahkan Rasa

Hari itu..
Dimana masih ada kata "kita"
Dimana semua berjalan sesuai rencana
Dimana kita berusaha untuk menjadi penting satu sama lain
Tapi..
Hari ini
Dimana tidak ada lagi kata "kita"
Dimana semua rencana hanya sebuah rencana
Dimana tidak ada lagi usaha untuk menjadi penting satu sama lain
Apa anda berpikiran yang sama?
Kini saya mencoba mematahkan rasa
Tapi,
Mengapa matamu seolah berkata "tunggulah sejenak.."?
Apa itu yang harus saya lakukan?
Apa saya termasuk orang yang bodoh akan masalah perasaan?
Isi pikiran saya hanya habiskan waktu untuk menunggu anda
Terlihat bodohkah?
Apa mungkin saya bisa mematahkan rasa, sementara hati ini enggan untuk mematahkan rasa
sudah banyak cara yang saya lakukan
tidakkah anda tau?
Sejauh ini saya belum menyerah
What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
Apa mungkin saya mematahkan rasa ini?